Old Man Verdant?
You might be wondering what you’ve stumbled into. You have found Old Man Verdant, The Knave of Noel. Someone you know has hidden this being inside your house for you to find when you least expect it! Now it is your turn to bestow this wonderful creature onto someone else, friend or foe!
Let’s go over some rules…
- 1. The Knave of Noel can be found at any time, however he can only be hidden for the 4 weekends prior to Christmas!
- 2. This likeness of Old Man Verdant should be hidden well! But, beware, hiding him too effectively could cause him to be lost forever!
- 3. When you find Old Man Verdant do not try to find out who it was that hid this creature in your home. Simply put him somewhere safe and private, and begin to plan for next Christmas!
Old Man Verdant, the Knave of Noel
The Mischievous Merrymaker
Before he was Santa Claus, Old Man Verdant was the original spirit of holiday ‘pranks-giving.’ His green face is said to be stained from sampling too many batches of ‘experimental’ punch—which usually contained too much crushed juniper berry and a dash of swamp root. He appears not to leave toys, but to rearrange things.
If you woke up on Christmas morning to find your stockings filled with lumps of coal and your dog wearing a tiny elf hat, that was Verdant’s work. His sack isn’t full of presents, but of practical joke supplies: bags of fake snow, squeaky coal, and a lifetime supply of glitter that only sticks to furniture. He is personally responsible for every time you find that single tangled Christmas light strand when you open the decorations box.
The Lore of Old Man Verdant
- The Green Stain and The Oath
The green color of Verdant’s face is not just a stain, but the sign of a Broken Yule Oath. Centuries ago, Verdant was Santa’s head apprentice, but he grew tired of the endless niceness. He was caught attempting to replace the entire toy cargo with bags of itching powder. As punishment, Santa banished him to the Boughs of Misrule and cast a spell: his face would forever be the color of unripe juniper berries, marking him as the patron of all minor annoyances.
- The Sack of Setbacks
The heavy sack he carries is not a bag of gifts, nor just pranks, but the Sack of Setbacks. It is magically lined and filled with all the little things that go wrong during the holidays:
Dead Batteries: Every battery that mysteriously dies on Christmas morning.
Missing Tape: The spool of wrapping tape you know you just had a moment ago.
The Left Sock: The single, unmatchable sock lost to the wash, forever to be felt and rediscovered.
Verdant’s ritual is to sneak into homes and release one or two of these Setbacks, ensuring maximum frustration at the worst moment.
- The Great Rivalry: Verdant vs. The Christmas Gnome
Old Man Verdant’s great rival is The Christmas Gnome (or Nisse). While Santa oversees the grand giving of gifts, the Gnome is the spirit of quiet domestic order and protection. Verdant hates the orderly, helpful nature of the Gnome.
The Conflict: If you leave out milk and cookies, you are feeding Santa. If you leave out a small bowl of porridge, you are appeasing the Gnome. Verdant’s ultimate goal is to switch the labels on all the milk and the porridge, causing maximum confusion and upsetting both his rival and the Big Man.
Ode of Verdant
When the hearth is warm and the moon hangs low,
With silent steps through the winter snow,
Comes Old Man Verdant, face stained green,
The most mischievous soul ever seen.
His sack is not filled with dolls or new skates,
But switched-out sugar and dinner plate mistakes.
He hides the remote and he tangles the string,
He knows every trick that the season can bring.
So when Christmas lights flicker and won’t turn on true,
You’ve been visited by the Knave of Noel, it is true!
Some of The Knave’s Pranks
Verdant’s pranks are never loud or malicious, but focused on frustrating simple, everyday holiday tasks.
- The Tape Tab Vanish: He magically snaps off and removes the starting tab of the wrapping tape roll, making it impossible to find the seam without frantic, fingernail-shredding effort.
- The Mismatched Mug: He sneaks into the kitchen and rotates every single coffee mug in the cupboard so that the handle points inward, causing awkward reaching and minor confusion.
- The Knot of the Knave: He performs a rhythmic, spiteful dance known as the “Sorrow-Weave” ensuring that when you pull out your lights in December, you’ll spend three hours just finding the plug.
The Ballad of Verdant the Green
(Tune: Simple and slightly off-key, like a fiddle played in the cold)
(Verse 1)
Hark, list to the tale of the Knave of Noel,
Whose face is of ivy and heart is of coal!
He trained in the North, where the good spirits dwell,
But cursed by the oath that he broke and he fell!
He broke and he fell, yes, he plotted and planned,
Now lives in the Fjells of Unspoken Land!
(Chorus)
Oh, Old Man Verdant, with a scowl and a grin,
He’s moss-stained and crusty, where the old pines begin.
If you hear a strange whisper and a cold wind blow,
It’s the Knave setting Setbacks beneath the fresh snow!
(Verse 2)
He watches the fire through a frosted pane,
And laughs at the troubles that bring householders pain.
He reaches his sack, not for dollies or treats,
But for trouble and bother in kitchen and streets!
He messes the handles and turns cups around,
No order or neatness in his haunt shall be found!
(Chorus)
Oh, Old Man Verdant, with a scowl and a grin,
He’s moss-stained and crusty, where the old pines begin.
If you hear a strange whisper and a cold wind blow,
It’s the Knave setting Setbacks beneath the fresh snow!
(Verse 3)
The children are eager, the paper is near,
But the Tape Tab is gone, and a new curse is here!
He swaps out the salt for the sugar so sweet,
A sour surprise in the coffee you’ll meet!
His exile is bitter, his spirit is dark,
Leaving nothing behind but a mischievous mark!
(Outro)
So lock up your spice racks and check on your gear,
For Verdant the Green is forever quite near!
Hark!
0 Comments